| Lyrics: | Mama was the one who reached down and tied my shoelace.
Mama spit on her fingers and used it
to clean dirt off my face.
Brush your teeth, Q-tip your ear,
take off your
sister's new brassiere.
Watch PBS, not Deputy Dawg,
don't you eat that Lincoln Log.
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Oh mama I still don't believe
it's true: The tooth fairy was you.
No Way!
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I love you maaaaaama,
more than than paaaastrama,
way more than Jeffrey
Daaaahma,
even more than my NFL paaaaajamas.
Mama always calmed down dad when he
got too mean.
Like the time he almost hit me for stealing his Juggs magazine.
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Stop your jumping,
you'll break the bed.
Don't you fill up
on the bread.
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Take those
Take those
(trying to read cue card)
Take ... carrots out of your
nose,
that's not a hat that's pantyhose.
Don't play baseball in your suit,
that
Magnum PI's very cute.
Don't forget Vick's Vapor-rub,
stop masturbating in the tub.
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Thanks for making corn beef hash,
and putting powder on my rash.
(So much better.)
I love you maaaaaama,
more than golf with Arnold Paaaaalmaaaa,
more than
yellow moons in Lucky Chaaaaamaaaas,
Def Leppard's drummer only had one aaaaaaamaaa.
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Oh, Mrs. Nealon, yes it's true,
Kevin's gonna sing to you.
Come on
Kevin.
I love you maaaaaama
Come on, keep goin'.
More than
films by Brian DePaaaaalmaaaa.
Thanks for being my date to the praaaaamaaaa.
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Thanks for writing that note to the draft
board that said I was gay so I got out
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of Vietnaaaamaaa.
Mom your way better than the World Trade Center baaaaamaaaa.
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Who's name by the w |
