| Lyrics: | In the beginning GOD made 'the light.' Shortly thereafter GOD made the poodle-as you can see by this
model that we have in front of us. When GOD made the poodle initially it was a very handsome sort of
a dog-it had HAIR, HAIR, HAIR, evenly distributed all over its charming canine poodle-shape
body.
Shortly after the construction of the poodle itself, GOD made TWO big mistakes. The
first one was called MAN, and the second one was called WO-MAN. WO-MAN looketh upon the poodle and
saith unto herself, "This poodle, with hair evenly distributed all over its body, is of no use to me
for it is not SLICK, it is not STREAMLINE, it is not FASHIONABLE, and in many instances it is
REPULSIVE because of the brown things attached to the hair on the rear part of the dog, and I must
have this dog modified," so he turneth onto MAN, and saith unto MAN, "SUCKER, GO GET A JOB!" And
MAN, being the chump that he was, wenteth out and wenteth forth and lefteth the cave, and went into
the world itself and gotteth a job.
Whereupon he returneth to the cave with his MONEY, and
the WO-MAN looketh upon the money and said, "SUCKER! Take this money and go buy me a pair of
scissors, whereby I may clippeth upon this poodle and modify it to my own personal taste and secret
moist innermost DESIRES." And the MAN, being the chump that he was, went out and bought her the
poodle clipping shears and broughth 'em back to the WO-MAN and handeth the shears to the WO-MAN,
whereupon she GRABBETH the poodle thusly . . . and with a DEFT, SWIFT, DENSE ECUMENICAL PATINA (Talk
about it!) of STROKE (Talk about it!), she clippeth upon the poodle, near the FETLOCK, all across
the THORAX, in the MEDULA, and . . . right near the cappuciano o'er here, and streamlined that
sucker until it looked just like this, with little feet sticking out and a little ball on the end,
making the dags very easy to remove, and she putteth t |
