| Lyrics: | THAIS
(Newman Levy)
One time in Alexandria, in wicked
Alexandria
Where nights were wild with revelry and life was but a game,
There lived, so
the report is, an adventuress and courtesan
The pride of Alexandria, and Thais was her
name.
(Break: Naughty Lady of Shady Lane)
Nearby, in peace and piety, avoiding
all society
There dwelt a band of holy men who'd made their refuge there,
And in the
desert's solitude, they spurned all earthly folly to
Devote their lives to holy works, to
fasting and to prayer.
(Break: Break, oh Mighty Fortress)
Now one monk whom I
solely mention of this band of holy men
Was known as Athaneal, he was famous near and
far.
At fasting bouts and prayer, with him, none other could compare
with
him,
At plain and fancy praying he could do the course in par.
(Break:God of our
Fathers)
One day while sleeping heavily, from wresting with the Devil he
Had gone to
bed exhausted, though the sun was shining still
He had a vision Freudian, and though he was
annoyed, he an-
Alyzed it in the well-known style of Doctors Jung and Brill.
(Break:Dr. Freud)
He dreamed of Alexandria, of wicked Alexandria.
A crowd of men was
cheering in a manner rather rude.
And Athaneal glancing there at THAIS, who was dancing
there
Observed her do the shimmy, in what artists call The Nude!
(Break: Samson and
Delilah)
Said he,"This dream fantastical disturbs my thoughts monastical,
Some
unsuppressed desire, I fear, has found my monkish cell.
I blushed up to the hat o' me to view
that girl's anatomy
I'll go to Alexandria and save her soul from Hell!"
(Break:
Onward Christian Soldiers)
So, pausing not to wonder where he'd put his winter
underwear
He quickly packed his evening clothes, a toothbrush and a vest
To guard against
exposure he threw in some woolen hosiery
And bidding all the boys Adieu, he started on his
quest.
(Break: Happy Wanderer)
The monk, though warned and fortified was deeply
shocked and
mortified,
To find, on his arrival, wild debauchery in sway.
While
some were in a stupor, sent by booze of more than two
percent,
The rest were all
behaving in a most immoral way.
(Break: Passengers Will Please Refrain)
Said he
to Thais, "Pardon me. Although this job is hard on me,
I've got to put you straight to what I
came out hear to tell:
What's all this boozin' gettin' you? Cut out this pie-eyed
retinue,
Let's hit the road together, kid, and save you soul from Hell!"
(Break:
Onward Christian Soldiers)
Although this bold admonishment caused Thais some
astonishment,
She quickly answered,"Say! You said a heaping mouthful, Bo!
This burg's a
frost, I'm telling you. The brand of hooch they're
selling you
Ain't like the stuff
you used to get, so let's pack up and go!"
(Break: Blowing in the Wind)
So off
from Alexandria, from wicked Alexandria
Across the desert sands they go, beneath the burning
sun.
Till Thais, parched and sweltering, finds refuge in the
sheltering
Seclusion of a convent in the habit of a nun.
(Break:
Dominique)
And now the monk is terrified to find his fears are verified
His holy
vows of chastity have cracked beneath the strain!
Like one who has a jag on, he cries out in
grief and agony
"I'd sell my soul to see her do the shimmy once again!"
(Break: Snake
Dance)
Alas! His pleadings amorous, though passionate and clamorous
Have come too late.
The courtesan has danced her final dance.
Said he,"Now that's a joke on me, for that there dame
to croak on
me,
I never should have passed her up the time I had a
chance!"
NOTE: Breaks are instrumental breaks as performed by
Nick
Krukovsky.
@ballad @religion @drink
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