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Lyrics for The Illinois Enema Bandit by Zappa Frank:
| | | Artist: | Zappa Frank |
| | Album: | Zappa In New York | | Track: | The Illinois Enema Bandit | | | | Date Added: | 18/10/2007 | | Views: | 343 | | | | Lyrics: | --- --- -
And now folks it's time for
Don Pardo
To deliver our
special
Illinois Enema Bandit-type announcement
Take it away, Don
"This is a
true story
About a famous criminal
From right around Chicago
This is the story
of
Michael Kenyon
A man who's serving time at this very moment
For the crime of armed
robbery
It so happened, that at the time of the robbery
Michael, decided to give his
female victims
A little enema
Apparently, there was no law against that
But his name
lives on
Michael Kenyon
THE ILLINOIS ENEMA BANDIT!"
The Illinois Enema
Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful
screams
Of all them college-educated women...
Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up
(They'd
be all bound down!)
Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The
Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag
fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with
all the bag
fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of
'em up with all the bag
fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
The Illinois
Enema Bandit
I heard it on the news
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois...he
has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized
bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna
pump
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Lookin' for
some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
The Illinois Enema
Bandit
One day he'll have to pay
One day he'll have to pay
The police will say,
*"You're under arrest!"*
And the judge would have him for a special guest
The D.A. will
order a secret test
And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll
put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, *"No poo-poo jokes!"*
Then
they'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Sayin' "Don't nobody have no sympathy...
HOT
SOAP WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"
And then the bandit might say, *"Why is everybody looking' at
me?"*
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS KINDA
MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
Now, one girl shout: *"Let the Bandit
be!"*
BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY? TELL ME NOW, WHAT'S
YOUR
PLEA?
Another girl shout: *"Let the fiend go free!"*
ARE YOU GUILTY? BANDIT, DID YOU DO
THESE DEEDS?
The Bandit say, *"It must be just what they all needs..."*
*"It must be just
what they all needs..."*
*"It must be just what they all needs..."*
*"It must be just what
they all needs..."*
*"It must be just what they all needs..."*
*"It must be just what they
all needs..."*
etc. repeat
Wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna enema
Enema
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