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Lyrics for Jerry springer by Weird Al:
| | | Artist: | Weird Al |
| | Album: | Various songs / Unsorted | | Track: | Jerry springer | | | | Date Added: | 18/10/2007 | | Views: | 73 | | | | Lyrics: | It's been one week since we got to see
Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry
Five
days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the slut and the crack ho
Three
days since we heard the tale
About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male
Yesterday it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Holy cow, d'you see it last week?
Well, they had this one freak
Who
sucker-punched his whole family
Do you recall when the brawl
Became a total
free-for-all?
And Jerry's in the middle tryin' to be the referee
Hey, see the
stripper with the implants?
She likes to lap dance
And date the boyfriend of her
mother
Now here comes Jerry's next guest
And it's a slugfest
'Cause it's her
trailer trash brother
Nymphomaniac is back on crack
It's like "When Animals Attack"
They all exhibit reprehensible behavior
Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their clothes
Step on their toes, that's how it goes
They get so violent they have to sign a waiver
They're always swearin', cursin', kickin' butt and pointin' blame
On the
air? They don't care, they've got no shame
There was one guy who I'm sure felt a little
strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to
scream and yell constantly
They have a history of ripping off their shirts
It's been one week since they had the fight
With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awful brawl
They still haven't got the blood off the wall
It's been three days since the bitter feud
Between the KKK and that gay Jewish black
dude
Yesterday, finally dawned on me
I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry
Springer
male Springer guest: Baby, I've been sleepin' with your sister.
female Springer guest: Oh, which one?
male Springer guest: All of 'em.
female
Springer guest: Ah, well, I've been sleepin' with your best friend Jake.
male Springer
guest: Yeah? W-Well, me too! And, I've been sleepin' with your dog Woofie!
female Springer
guest: Woofie, you b*tch! Well I'm also sleepin' with your pet goat!
male Springer guest:
That goat doesn't love you!
Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin'
Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin'
Jerry's the king of confrontation
He's a sensation
He puts the 'sin' in syndication
It's totally worthless,
like a bad check
It's like a train wreck
Don't wanna stare, but you can't look away
Like Sally Jesse he does talk shows
But with more weirdos
The ratings jumpin'
higher every day
If you've seen the show, well then you know
It's just as low as you
can go
The guests are tacky and they're lacking in their hygiene
And pretty soon
some ugly goon
Comes in the room and then it's BOOM
In the face of some unsuspecting
drag queen
Well, it's the kind of show where people scream obscenities
Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies
"Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their
favorite chant
Should I turn off my TV? I just can't
I have a tendency to watch it
religiously
I have a history of taping each one
It's been one week since the
show about
Psycho killers with problems they should work out
Five days since the big
surprise
When some loser's wife said that she's still dating twenty guys
Three days
since he interviewed
A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were all nude
Yesterday, it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer
I've got way too much class to watch Jerry
Springer
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